Text Received: From Mars
12/02/2145 14:34:22PM
Jade. How have you been? Are you happy? Have you been eating well? Sleeping? I’m sorry I put you through this. I know you said you never wanted to hear from me again, but I figured it’s been so long now you might not be mad anymore…what was I thinking? Of course, you’re still mad. It’s you we’re talking about, after all. Have you found someone else? I hope not. I’m running out of characters. I miss you, you know. I’ll wait for your reply. I’m sorry.
Jade’s hand shook as she placed her phone on the café table. She thought about it for a moment, running her finger around the rim of her iced coffee. Should she reply? She could imagine the cheesy smirk that would stretch across his face if her name flashed on his phone.
Plus, even if she did reply, what’s the guarantee he would even get it? Her phone plan didn’t include unlimited space kilometres and she didn’t even know how far away he was. She grabbed her phone and typed on it quickly. Mars is 202.81 million kilometres away. How many millions did she get in her phone plan? How long does it take a text to reach someone on Mars? How many—Jade stopped and put her phone down.
He was right. She was still mad. And Jade wasn’t one to forgive easily, especially if the other person was millions of kilometres away exploring the universe or whatever. Jade didn’t need to worry about a man like that. She was here, on Earth, and she wasn’t the type to pine over an ex-boyfriend who picked their space-army career over her. He can wait all he wants; a reply won’t be coming.
Text Received: From Jupiter
23/04/2147 21:32:09PM
So, I guess you’re never going to reply, then? I’ve waited a while. At least two months. You should have received my text by now. Earth’s time is faster, right? How long has it been there? I know you’re mad, Jade. I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. I don’t know what more to say. I shouldn’t have left. I miss you and I miss Earth and I miss gravity. I don’t like it here. But some days I do. Can I really regret going? Wasn’t it what I wanted? Maybe space just makes you feel lonely. I really am s—
Jade had nearly forgotten about him…nearly. But not quite. The text was a surprise—she’d moved on in the two years since his last. She’d found someone new, someone different. She rolled away from her new lover, her finger hovering over the message as though touching the pixeled words was the same as caressing the freckled skin on his cheeks. She read the words over and over, letting them imprint into her mind.
She wondered when he typed these words; what she was doing the moment he was thinking of her. Was she eating dinner? Watching a movie? Having sex? Was she thinking of him, too? He would be older now, but her even more so. She wondered where he was sitting. What he could see. Jade slipped from her bed, phone clenched tightly in her fist, leaving her partner in the warm cocoon of blankets.
The balcony was cold, but Jade felt warmer than ever. She looked up at the few stars she could see in her brightly lit corner of the world. Had he seen the same lights before they travelled through space to reach her? She hit reply and began typing, writing whatever came to mind. I love you. I miss you. When are you coming back? The door rattled behind her. Her lover asked what she was doing and wrapped her in his arms; they were cold, jarring, even though his skin was flushed. She melted into him and deleted her text.
Text Received: From Neptune
18/10/2158 07:28:12AM
How long has it been on Earth since I left? It’s only been two years up here, but someone told me that’s like ten or fifteen on Earth. They told me when I signed up. I just didn’t think…I thought I could just…come back. That you’d be there, waiting. That we could pick up where we left off. That I could spend the rest of my life begging for your forgiveness. Are you married? Don’t answer that. I’m now 28 and you’re somewhere between 38 and 42. If I came back right now, could we still make it work?
Jade saw the message and cried. Her kids asked her what was wrong as she drove them to school. Allergies, she’d said, blaming their cat. Why did he have to leave? Why did she still care? When she made it home, Jade looked at herself in the mirror. Puffed, red eyes. Skin that didn’t fit her as well as it used to. He was only 28? Jade sunk to the floor and cried some more, but still saved the message.
Text Received: Unknown Location
13/03/2165 09:46:23AM
Jade. I was told to send a message to my loved ones before we disembark. Just in case, you know. Even though you won’t reply, I know you’ll still read it and that’s enough for me. It’s not like I have anyone else to send it to, anyway. You know that, too. You’re all I have…or had. If you don’t hear from me again, then I’m probably dead. I’m sorry for being selfish. I’m sorry for leaving you. Even if I live, should I not text? I love you, still.
Michelle, Jade’s teenage daughter, read the text flashing on her mother’s phone and promptly wished she hadn’t. Was her mother cheating on her father? How long for? Who was this man? Should she tell her brother? Michelle didn’t want to deal with this. She wanted to go back to her happy-go-lucky life, where she didn’t have to worry about her parents’ marriage crumbling around her. Michelle scrolled up, looking through the saved messages. Whoever this ‘Dave’ was, he’d sent a lot. But her mother had never replied. Michelle began reading, quickly skimming her eyes over the painful words. She marked the text as unread and put it back, pretending she saw nothing.
Jade was used to seeing his messages by now. They still meant something—they always would—but this was the first one that scared her. She didn’t bother thinking about it this time, typing her reply instantly.
Text Undeliverable
Text Undeliverable
Text Undeliverable
Text Sent: Unknown Location
13/03/2165 11:21:01AM
Please let me know if you’re alive.
Time until delivery:
6 years 32 days and 9 minutes
6 years 32 days and 8 minutes
Text Received: Sector 13997821.C
14/04/2172 11:30:09AM
I’m not sure if you want to know, but I’m alive. I would want to know if it was the other way around. I miss you.
Jade relaxed into the couch, a small smile on her face. He was alive. Or he was when he sent that text. Who knows if he’d died in the time between? She frowned, wishing she’d never thought about him.
Text Received: Sector 13997821.C
14/04/2178 11:20:21AM
I’m replying as soon as I saw your text, but I know it’s been years since you’ve sent it. I’ve already told you I’m alive. But hey, I’m still alive. I still miss you, too. You’re all I think about. I wonder what you look like now? I wonder if you have kids, if you’re married. I wonder about you all the time. I don’t want to know. I keep imagining what life would have been like if I’d not been an idiot and stayed on Earth. Would I be your husband? Would we have broken up? Would I regret—
Jade put her phone down and looked out the window at her grandchildren playing in the sun. Laughter echoed into her ears as they rolled in the plush grass. Did she regret her life? She pulled her shawl tighter around her shoulders and imagined what life would have been like if he’d never left.
If she’s honest with herself, they probably wouldn’t have worked out anyway. He was too daring, too selfish, and she was too stubborn, too traditional. He wanted to explore the universe and see all there was to see. She just wanted to live a simple, Earth-based life. He needed a woman who was adventurous like him. And if he’d never joined the space-army and stayed on Earth he’d probably be cursing his life, blaming her for tying him to this planet.
Jade shook her head free of the intruding thoughts as Michelle placed a cup of tea next to her. Jade looked at Michelle, really looked. She noticed the way Michelle’s right eye squinted a little, the deep smile lines on her cheeks, the slight bags under her eyes. Jade thanked her daughter and grabbed her hand tightly. Yes, her life was good.
Text Received: Unknown Location
07/08/2189 13:42:12PM
Space is beautiful, you know. I wish I could show you everything I’ve seen. Well, maybe not everything. Just the good things. Like the way hair floats in zero-gravity, or what a nebula looks like up close, or what it feels like to be in space alone. I’ve taken pictures, but they don’t look the same. Sometimes I wonder if I’ve explored space too much. Do I have enough time left to explore Earth? What have you seen that I haven’t? Would I even still know you? Or are you a different person entirely? I’m coming home. See you soon.
Jade used a pair of shaky fingers to zoom in on the text message. She couldn’t help the bubble of laughter that escaped her as she read the message. He was always so slow.
Text Received: From Earth
09/04/2194 09:21:09AM
I’ll be there in ten minutes.
Three light knocks on the door indicated he’d arrived. Michelle took a deep breath, brushing her sweaty palms on her skirt before opening the door. Dave was taller than she expected, and his skin was smoother than hers. She wondered who was older between them. He introduced himself and held out a scarred hand, thanking her for answering his calls. She shook it briefly, inviting him inside, directing him to Jade’s side.
Jade was old. She clung to life by threads of stubbornness; her breaths came in thick wheezes and her eyes fluttered every few seconds as though they weighed a thousand tonnes. Dave hadn’t expected her to be so frail. He sat by her side and gently wrapped her hand in his. She was cold, and he was not. She opened her eyes and whispered his name, her bony fingers gripping his hand slightly tighter.
‘Welcome home.’ A tear slid down her cheek as she tried to focus on his face.
Dave cried.
He sobbed.
He cried like a man who’d lost it all.
‘Tell me about the things I haven’t seen.’ Her voice was soft, airy. Barely there.
He told her everything he had seen. Everything good, at least. Jade closed her eyes and imagined herself in his shoes, floating through space. Dave was there, too. He held her hands and they stepped on stars and danced through galaxies. He showed her all there was to see, and more.